Spamming Your Facebook Friends

Sometimes you just want to know what world city you should live in. Or maybe what 90's song best encompasses your being. Sometimes it’s of fundamental importance to know what Everybody Loves Raymond character you are, you know? And thanks to Facebook apps, these lingering questions and more are now answerable by answering a few multiple choice questions. I’m not sure how I ever lived before without knowing what Roman philosopher I’m most like (Cicero, for those keeping track at home), but life has certainly made more sense lately.

Despite the somewhat snarky tone, I am an unabashed fan of these silly lil’ quizzes. And if you happen to run in the same Facebook network as I, the chances are you’ve also dabbled a time or two. Why the love? I don’t know– you want the academic answer? You wanna hear something about how postmodern identity is so fluid that our fragmented selves allow representation in . . . hell, never mind, not even gonna try. As I said in the opening paragraph, sometimes you just wanna know what alcohol you would be.

But lately it seems that the Facebook powers that be are increasingly locking these precious answers unless you choose to spam your friends with a request to also add the app. And I’m not talking one or two of your closest pals; most of the time, upwards of eight to twelve friends must be sent an invite before you can get an answer. Are your friends this understanding? Do they understand why you simply must know what cast member of The Hills you should date? Why any amount of spam may be necessary to know that Heidi Montag is your soulmate?

It’s not just the idea of being turned into a spam generator. It’s the feeling of forced social networking. Is Facebook not big enough? Are their not enough FB junkies out there to perpetuate the site without this forced connecting? Often there are one or two friends who I know for sure will be interested in hearing about an app I added. More often then not, I add apps just by browsing other people’s profiles and finding something interesting. Is this model not effective enough?

So come on Facebook. Give me my quiz results without spamming by entire social network. Trust me, when they find out that I’m Jacques Derrida they will come running to discover the essence of their own inner French philosopher.